These two pictures are her cheeks at their worst. I can't count how many times people asked me if she had rosacea or eczema. When strangers asked, I would just say yes. I was not going to get into the whole long story with someone I didn't even know. At the time I didn't realize how truly bad her cheeks looked but looking back at these pictures, it was pretty bad. Happy to say that her cheeks are clear now and she has no scars from it (which I worried about).
Let me paint the picture of inserting the tube for you.. I got all the supplies needed to change the tube (new tube, tape, scissors, gel etc) and while Paul held her down (she was already screaming at this point because she knew what was coming) I had to put some gel on the tube and slowly feed it through her nose until it got down to her stomach. She would shake her head and scream at the top of her lungs (An adult who had an ng tube inserted described it to me as a very unpleasant experience, your throat burns and it's just uncomfortable, every time you swallow.. you can feel it. Something is up your nose so your natural reaction is to get it out but you can't). I understand why she was screaming but it made it much more difficult for me (she really proved how strong she is). Sometimes she would win and I would have to do it three or four times before it finally went down all the way. By the time we were done, I was sweating. Then I had to use a stethoscope to listen to her stomach while I pushed some air through the tube, if I heard a gush of air, it was in. If I didn't hear it, that meant it was possibly in her lungs. Of course you can't feed formula into someone's lungs. If that happened, a trip to the ER would come next (luckily it never happened). Getting it in the right spot was crucial, I hated knowing that her health rested in my hands because again, I am not a medical professional. So that's pretty much the low down on Liv's tube days.. I can honestly say that I don't miss tube feeding AT ALL. Things have been so much easier since she's been off of it, I know she needed it at the time so I did what I had to do but I am very thankful that those days are behind us. The ng tube gave me a whole new perspective on tough love.
Tube or no tube, Olivia is beautiful! This is how I remember the first five months of her life. Her hair cracks me up in these pictures! Whenever we were going to change the tube, I would snap as many pictures as possible so we could have some without it. Although I took tons of pictures with it in, I never really shared them because I didn't want to get tons of questions but now since everyone knows the story, here's my former little tubie.