Tuesday, March 11, 2014

The truth about being a stay at home mommy

I didn't exactly plan on staying home for a whole year (and counting) but since everything happened the way it did, it was best for me to be home with Liv. I remember while I was pregnant I would always say "It will be so great staying home for a few months! The house will be clean, dinner will be ready and that will be my job!" lol.. yeah. freaking. right! Don't get me wrong, it is great (most of the time) but it's much harder taking care of a baby than I ever could have anticipated, I also wasn't counting on health problems. Let me say this.. I had a job at the same place for eight years and I've only been a stay at home mom for one year, every single job I've ever had has been much easier than mommyhood. People think I sit home and watch TV all day.. not so much. If and when the TV is on, it's on Bubble Guppies or Dora the Explorer while I'm quickly trying to wash the dishes or start a load of laundry. Between feeding Liv (still a struggle), giving her a bath, changing diapers, playing with her, taking her to doctor appointments, playgroup, running errands and dealing with the cats.. I barely get a minute to breathe. It also seems like we always need to go to the store for something.. diapers, wipes, food, medicine, clothes. I try to stock up on stuff but it still runs out really quick. Having a baby is not cheap, especially with tons of medical bills piling up. It's safe to say that I am ALWAYS tired (actually an understatement). Olivia comes first so everything I do for myself is done while she naps. Lucky for me she still naps twice a day, I try to use every minute I can in the best way. For instance, I've been writing these posts while she sleeps and I'm on the treadmill (a little risky, hopefully I don't break an arm or leg). But it actually works out because the times goes by much faster. Some days really fly by and some days seem to drag on forever and I end up counting down the hours minutes to her bedtime like it's New Years Eve! I guess it's part of mommyhood to have those rough days. We all have them so I try not to feel guilty when I think to myself that Olivia is driving me crazy! The funny thing is, after she's sleeping for a few hours I start to miss her and I just wanna wake her up and play with her. That would be a terrible decision so I haven't actually done it yet. I had previously said she has three teeth coming through, well I was wrong, it's four.. all at once. That explains her very cranky night last night. Poor kid and poor me! Lol kidding but she did wake up around 3am and just would not go back to sleep. I tried feeding her and rocking her but it didn't work. I had to give her medicine (not my favorite thing to do) cause I could tell she was in pain. After that, twenty minutes later she finally went back to sleep. I couldn't though. I am always so jealous of those people (Paul & Olivia) that can lay down and fall asleep within minutes. It takes me at minimum half an hour to fall asleep and that's on a good day. Before I had Liv, nothing could wake me up. I even worried about it when I was pregnant "what if she's crying for hours and I don't wake up?!" but now if she even just rolls over in her crib, I spring out of bed like the house is on fire! So weird. It's still strange to me that I have a baby, I say this all the time but I still don't feel like an adult. That sounds silly since I'm married with a baby. But seriously.. I'm eating a poptart for dinner. I guess another reason would be the fact that in many situations.. I decide that I need to consult with my parents in order to make the right decision. When you're a kid, adults always say (and I remember this vividly) "enjoy being a kid, you don't have any responsibility!" and I would just be like "yeah yeah whatever old man" well they were right (surprise!) I totally miss having zero bills, getting mail used to be fun. Okay.. I've definitely gone off topic and I'm starting to ramble.. happy Tuesday!!

No comments:

Post a Comment